1. |
Quitter
03:14
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If I knew you were going to quit
I wouldn’t have put up with all your tired bullshit
If I knew you would choose your dick
I wouldn’t have schooled you in my world and politics
And what do I get now
What do I get out of this wreckage
And what do I get now
What do I get—
I want my time back
I want my hype back
I want my advice back
I want my I want my
I want my cred back
I want my friends back
I want my respect back
I want mine I want mine I want mine back
If I knew that you were adulting
I would not have spared your little feelings
If I knew you were going to ghost
I would have ditched your ass a long time ago
And what do I get now
What do I get out of this wreckage
And what do I get now
What do I get—
I want my time back
I want my hype back
I want my advice back
I want my I want my
I want my cred back
I want my friends back
I want my respect back
I want mine I want mine I want mine back
Back when I look back (back)
I wish I kept track (track)
Of all the things you’ve taken
Facts are not abstract—
You cannot pay me back
Cause we’ll never be even
I want my time back
I want my hype back
I want my advice back
I want my I want my
I want my cred back
I want my friends back
I want my respect back
I want mine I want mine
I want my tears back
I want my peace back
I want my ideas back
I want my I want my
I want my cash back
I want my half back
I want my best friend back
I want mine I want mine I want mine back
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2. |
Sinister Sister
03:01
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She always wants to try control me
She never even tries to see my way
She thinks she’s always right
And she always wants to pick a fight
Cause she always wants to be the most heard
(my sister my sister)
Always wants the final word
(my sister my sister)
My life would better without her
My life would better without her
She brands herself as “Miss Woke Activist”
When in fact she’s just a tired narcissist
Why can’t she just be happy for me
I can’t deal with her negative energy
Cause she thinks she has it so much harder
(my sister my sister)
Always quick to play the martyr
(my sister my sister)
My life would better without her
My life would better without her
There’s not enough land or water
To keep us far enough apart
But I will build a fortress
To make sure she never gets back in my heart
There’s not enough land or water
To keep us far enough apart
So I will build a fortress
To make sure she never gets back in my heart
Cause she always wants to be the most heard
(my sister my sister)
Always wants the final word
(my sister my sister)
Cause she thinks she has it so much harder
(my sister my sister)
Always quick to play the martyr
My life would better without her
My life would better without her
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3. |
Baby, You're Projecting
03:15
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You’ve got a chip on your shoulder
You’re mad
You hold a grudge forever
You’re mad
You have every right
To want to fight
And I’m always on your side
Wanna make it right
But then you make me the problem
When you make me the problem
I gotta say
Maybe, baby
You’re projecting
Maybe, baby
You’re projecting
If you need to reject me on the way
Maybe, baby
You’re projecting
You went and found another
I was only glad
And as you fell even deeper
I tried to understand
And now you're starting over
Burning everything you had
How can you make me the problem?
When you make me the problem
I gotta say
Maybe, baby
You’re projecting
Maybe, baby
You’re projecting
If you need to blame everything on me
Maybe
It’s easier
Than to look in the mirror
It’s easier
Than to look in the mirror
Maybe, baby
Maybe, baby
Maybe, baby
Maybe, baby
Maybe, baby
You’re projecting
Maybe, baby
You’re projecting
If you need to reject me on the way
Maybe, baby
You’re projecting
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4. |
||||
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My friends they all tell me
I’m so very lucky
And I think they might be right
He’s wickedly funny
Cracks me up like nobody
I’m so glad he’s in my life
But when I glance away
Or don’t give enough praise
Something rearranges
Something in him changes
He loves me until he hates me
His love can turn on a dime
And he loves me until he hates me
I don’t know what it will be this time
My friends find it cute that he
Completely worships me
But I just want an even love
What does he see in me
Lover sister enemy
Or all of the above
And when we disagree
He’d rather I don’t speak
I feel his resentment
That he’s still so dependent
He loves me until he hates me
His love can turn on a dime
And he loves me until he hates me
I don’t know what it will be this time
How much therapy do we need to break free
Of all the history and what was passed down
Does it make me naïve
That I want to work it out
Cause I still believe
I still believe
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5. |
I Miss My Friends
02:53
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I tell you what I miss
I miss my friends today
I hope they still exist
Cause it’s them I miss today
We were always together
However, whenever
There for the
Best and the worst
And now we have to move
Heaven and earth
Just to find the time
How are you friend?
What are you feeling now?
What are you thinking about?
I’ll tell you what I wish
I wish we would run away
From the work and the kids and the partners for a day
It would be like the old times
movies and long drives
windows rolled all the way down
Singing free and loud
And really talking it out
How are you friend?
What are you feeling now?
What are you thinking about?
And it’s strange the things
You miss
Like a stranger
Who was once a friend
I tell you what I miss
I miss my friends today
I hope they still exist
Cause it’s them I miss today
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6. |
He Doesn't Listen To Me
03:10
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He doesn’t want to marry me
That’s OK I don’t need a ring
He doesn’t want to change what we’ve got
That’s OK but I don’t want us coasting
I tell him I need him to try
Put in some effort once in awhile
So won’t somebody tell him
That I am so close to breaking
Cause he doesn’t listen to me
So can somebody tell him
That we are so close to breaking
Cause he won’t take me seriously
Or is he waiting for me to leave?
Is he waiting for me to leave?
All he wants is me, a beer, and a book
And to him that sounds pretty good
But what I want is him, a whim, and adventure
Not just cuddle, settle or surrender
I tell him to think of us
Like something living that needs his touch
So won’t somebody tell him
That I am so close to breaking
Cause he doesn’t listen to me
So can somebody tell him
That we are so close to breaking
Cause he won’t take me seriously
Or is he waiting for me to leave?
Is he waiting for me to leave?
And when I ask him if he wants a future with me
He says yes but I don’t know if he’ll do the work that we need
Cause he don’t listen
So won’t somebody tell him
That I am so close to breaking
Cause he doesn’t listen to me
So can somebody tell him
That he is so close to losing
Cause he won’t take me seriously
Or is he waiting for me to leave?
Is he waiting for me to leave?
Is he waiting for me to leave?
Is he waiting for me to leave?
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7. |
Hate Club
02:47
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I’m always talking shit about you (behind your back)
To your exes, friends and cousins too (behind your back)
And we all have a great big laugh (thanks for that)
At how you’re just a piece of trash (a piece of trash)
Behind your back are evil intentions
Only fake friends out for destruction
Maybe sleep with one eye open tonight
Cause you never know what’s coming
Behind your back
I have nothing better to do (behind your back)
Than launch a hate club just for you (behind your back)
We make posters and murals with stencils (we love our crafts)
To get you forever cancelled (behind your back)
Behind your back are evil intentions
Only fake friends out for destruction
Maybe sleep with one eye open tonight
Cause you never know what’s coming
Behind your back
You think you need an enemy
You think you need me as an enemy
But these delusions won’t set you free
I’m always talking shit about you (behind your back)
I’m always talking shit about you (behind your back)
I’m always talking shit about you (behind your back)
I’m always talking shit about you (behind your back)
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8. |
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(You say) It’s so hard to be a man in this world now
(You say) It’s so hard to not offend every girl now
So you look to me for consolation
You want me to tell you you’re the exception
But you should get a shrink for that!
Good luck! You’re fucked!
Hats off! I’ve had enough!
Cause you don’t care about me
You just care what I think about you
Guess what? I don’t!
You don’t even cross my mind
You don’t even cross my mind
(You say) It’s so hard to compliment a woman
(You mean) It’s so hard to accept rejection
So you look to me for affirmation
You want me to tell you you’re so awesome
But you should call your mom for that!
Good luck! You’re fucked!
Hats off! I’ve had enough!
Cause you don’t care about my friends
You just care what they think about you
Guess what? They don’t!
You don’t even cross our minds
You don’t even cross our minds
Maybe next time
You’ll treat a girl better
Than just your reassurance bitch…
Good luck! You’re fucked!
Hats off! I’ve had enough!
Cause you don’t care about me
You just care what I think about you
Guess what? I don’t!
You don’t even cross my mind
You don’t even cross my mind
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9. |
Colonizer
02:58
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You’re a white man
I’m a brown girl
You have my hand
But you don’t know my world
I will never know
How much your love
Is just the validation
And there will never be a
Clear answer for this question
So I don’t need
A healer, saviour, colonizer
Just be my lover
So I don’t need
A healer, saviour, colonizer
Just be my lover
Just be my lover
I’m a brown girl
And you’re a white man
You love me good
But you don’t understand
How you’ll always look
That much better
For loving someone of colour
But I will always look
A little like
I betrayed my culture
So I don’t need
A healer, saviour, colonizer
Just be my lover
So I don’t need
A healer, saviour, colonizer
Just be my lover
Just be my lover
‘Cause when you’re just my lover
I don’t have to wonder
If I am just a moment
For you to feel better
About yourself
So I don’t need
A healer, saviour, colonizer
Just be my lover
So I don’t need
A healer, saviour, colonizer
Just be my lover
Just be my lover
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10. |
I Have To Forgive Myself
04:04
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I tried to repent
Make amends
I tried to talk less
Listened
But everything I do
Makes you
Mad
And everything I say
Makes you
Run away
I know
I know you’ll never forgive me
So I have to forgive myself
I forgive me
I forgive me
Am I the villain?
Cause it feels like I am
This silent treatment
Is your punishment
And every day gone
Comes at a cost
Cause every day gone
Is another we’ve lost
I know
I know you’ll never forgive me
So I have to forgive myself
I forgive me
I forgive me
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11. |
Cut Me Out
04:00
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These words have lost meaning
This heart has lost feeling
I know that we both are tired of trying
But these fingers still know your number
And everyday I sit and wonder
If I should call you as a final endeavour
But if this bond feels like a cage
Maybe it has to break
Maybe it has to break
Maybe you were right
To cut me out of your life
Cut me out of your life
Cut me out of your life
These months have been painful
Every day without you I’ve been unstable
And my tears are souvenirs of your betrayal
But in the rare quiet moments
When I look at all the components
My mind is inclined to agree with your perspective
So if this bond feels like a cage
Maybe it has to break
Maybe it has to break
Maybe you were right
To cut me out of your life
Cut me out of your life
Cut me out of your life
And I don’t agree with how you said goodbye
No conversation you just let us die
But if talking to me makes you feel heavy
And thinking of me makes you feel less than
I don’t want that
I don’t want that
So if this bond feels like a cage
Maybe it has to break
Maybe it has to break
Maybe you were right
To cut me out of your life
Cut me out of your life
Cut me out of your life
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12. |
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You’re a white man
I’m a brown girl
You have my hand
But you don’t know my world
I will never know
How much your love
Is just the validation
And there will never be a
Clear answer for this question
So I don’t need
A healer, saviour, colonizer
Just be my lover
So I don’t need
A healer, saviour, colonizer
Just be my lover
Just be my lover
I’m a brown girl
And you’re a white man
You love me good
But you don’t understand
How you’ll always look
That much better
For loving someone of colour
But I will always look
A little like
I betrayed my culture
So I don’t need
A healer, saviour, colonizer
Just be my lover
So I don’t need
A healer, saviour, colonizer
Just be my lover
Just be my lover
‘Cause when you’re just my lover
I don’t have to wonder
If I am just a moment
For you to feel better
About yourself
So I don’t need
A healer, saviour, colonizer
Just be my lover
So I don’t need
A healer, saviour, colonizer
Just be my lover
Just be my lover
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13. |
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If I knew you were going to quit
I wouldn’t have put up with all your tired bullshit
If I knew you would choose your dick
I wouldn’t have schooled you in my world and politics
And what do I get now
What do I get out of this wreckage
And what do I get now
What do I get—
I want my time back
I want my hype back
I want my advice back
I want mine I want mine
I want my cred back
I want my friends back
I want my respect back
I want mine I want mine I want mine back
If I knew that you were adulting
I would not have spared your little feelings
If I knew you were going to ghost
I would have ditched your ass a long time ago
And what do I get now
What do I get out of this wreckage
And what do I get now
What do I get—
I want my time back
I want my hype back
I want my advice back
I want my I want my
I want my cred back
I want my friends back
I want my respect back
I want mine I want mine I want mine back
Back when I look back (back)
I wish I kept track (track)
Of all the things you’ve taken
Facts are not abstract—
You cannot pay me back
Cause we’ll never be even
if i knew you were comfy bein a dummy,
i would not waste my breath
i would run the other way
unmatch disconnect i’m
not disposable
and i say it with my chest
tell me who i have to be
to get some reciprocity
climbing up a Hill -for what?
you’re fuckin with my energy
you
stuck in reverse
a
colonial curse
you intimidated cos
i hold the universe
i am magic
and it’s tragic
how you refuse to grow
you trampled on my garden
all the seeds i sowed put it
all on the table
you stay a no show
i just want my time back
i just want my mind back
you don’t see the mirror
reflecting all of your harm back
baby you’re projecting
on this bridge called my back
it’s not abstract
it’s facts
land back
I want my time back
I want my hype back
I want my advice back
I want my I want my
I want my cred back
I want my friends back
I want my respect back
I want mine I want mine
I want my tears back
I want my peace back
I want my ideas back
I want my I want my
I want my cash back
I want my half back
I want my best friend back
I want mine I want mine I want mine back
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Vivek Shraya Toronto, Ontario
Vivek Shraya is an artist whose body of work crosses the boundaries of music, literature, visual art, theatre, and film. She is a Canadian Screen Award winner and a Polaris Music Prize nominee. Her CBC Gem Original Series, "How to Fail as a Popstar," is launching this fall. ... more
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